眼淚男女有別

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中國時報 2007.11.10　
時代觀感真的變了 男彈淚…真情流露 女啜泣…情緒失控
陳文和／綜合報導

　美國賓夕法尼亞州立大學最新的一項研究顯示，社會觀念已有相當變化，大眾愈來
愈更能接受男性落淚，但對於女性哭泣的接受度卻與日俱減。

　賓州州立大學以284人作為樣本進行研究，發現男性揮淚較女性飲泣更能獲得正面
評判。研究人員解析，這是因為男性彈淚通常被視為真情流露，而女性啜泣卻被認為是情
緒失控。

　這確實符合社會對男女性的刻板印象。加州大學魯茲教授指出，這也可說明為何男
性政治人物可以偶爾落淚（至少在美國），而女性政治人物卻總得要強忍淚水。

　男性一般的形象是堅強且冷靜，一旦落淚，通常會被視為內心深處真誠情感的流
露。然而，女性政治人物則必須隨時塑造強勢的形象，才能撐起自己的一片天。因此，
當女性哭泣時，就會進一步強化一般人的刻板印象，讓人認為她平常的堅強只是表面工
夫，且暴露了內心的脆弱。

　《哭泣：眼淚的自然史與文化史》一書作者魯茲指出，這就是柯林頓之所以能比希
拉蕊更常掉眼淚的原因。

　《心理學》期刊的心理治療師貝絲可葳兒女士表示，其實多愁善感是男子共通的特
性，但男性在成長過程中，總被要求在面臨壓力與傷心事時，極力自持不要流露情緒，
因此，他們必須尋求其他的宣洩出口。貝絲可葳兒點出，最憂鬱的樂曲都是由男性詮釋，
而且聆聽的人也多為男性。此即男性處理不能輕易流露的情感的一種方式。

　此外，她舉研究結果說，淚眼盈眶比放聲痛哭更能讓人接受，這是因為眼淚有陰陽
屬性之別，哭哭啼啼被認為是雌性的特徵，因此男人不宜。

　美國前總統雷根以及之後的歷任美國總統，偶爾會讓眼角泛出淚光，以證情感之真
誠。但假若他們放聲痛哭，勢必會被視為軟弱。

　美國加州大學2001年的一項研究顯示，65%的美國男性自稱幾乎未曾哭過，而女
性則有63%表示偶爾會掉淚，另有18%自承時常哭泣。男女自敘哭的方式也有顯著差
異，多數女性描述自己會「啜泣、號啕大哭」或「輕泣、顫抖」，而男性泰半只說自己
會「紅了眼眶和落下一兩滴淚」，或是「想哭但旁人看不出來」。

　加大的研究也指出，絕大多數的人都會私下哭泣。雖然在工作場合落淚仍是禁忌，
但眼淚在職場仍有可能極具效用，尤其是男人出乎人預料的眼淚。

http://news.chinatimes.com/2007Cti/2007Cti-News/2007Cti-News-Content/0,4521,110504+112007111000487,00.html

A recent study from Penn State University in the US suggests that tears
are becoming more acceptable for men and less so for women.

The study, using a sample of 284 people, found that men were judged
much more positively for crying than women. This, according to the
study’s authors, was because men were seen as expressing honest
emotion where women were seen as out of control.

This could be to do with our stereotypical view of men and women. And,
says Professor Tom Lutz, of the University of California, Riverside, it is
why male politicians, at least in the US, can allow themselves the
occasional tear, whereas women cannot. A man is seen as strong and
unemotional, so crying hints at depth. A woman politician has to portray
herself as tough to succeed. So when a woman cries it reinforces
stereotypes and tells us that her toughness was just a front and she has
revealed herself to be weak underneath.

“This is why Bill Clinton can cry more than Hillary can,” says Lutz, the
author of Crying: The Natural and Cultural History of Tears.

But have things changed in the postwar period? Lutz thinks that they have,
not least because of the “feminist attack on male emotional constipation”.
This, allied to the increasing acceptance of a psychotherapeutic world
view, has made men more open, he says.

According to Emma Baskerville, a psychotherapist for Psychologies
magazine, however, sentimentality is a common male trait. “It’s an
opportunist outpouring of emotion,” she says, “men are raised to keep a
tight rein on their emotions in times of genuine stress and grief, so they
look for other outlets.” She points out that most melancholic music is
performed and consumed by men. It’s a way for them to deal with
emotions that they are otherwise encouraged to keep under wraps. There
are, of course, different sorts of tears — a moist eye being seen as much
more acceptable than open crying. This is because, studies suggest, there
are male and female tears. Open sobbing is a strong sign of being
female, and so is seen as inappropriate for men. Ronald Reagan — and
every US president after him — on occasion allowed a tear to come to the
side of his eye as a testament to the honesty of his emotion. If he had
started blubbing we would have seen him as weak.

A University of California study in 2001 indicated that 65 per cent of men
said they almost never cried, whereas 63 per cent of women said they
cried occasionally and 18 per cent frequently. There was also a significant
difference in the type of tears cried. Most women described how they
cried as “real sobbing and bawling”, or “slight sobbing and shaking”. The
majority of men confessed only to “red eye and a tear or two”, or “feel
like crying but no visible sign”.

The California study also suggests that people overwhelmingly cry in
private. Crying at work seems to be the final taboo. It can, however, be
very useful, especially for a large man from whom tears are unexpected.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/men/article2811643.ece